Thursday, October 23, 2014

crappy vs happy

Once upon a time my sister in love, Erin, did a post titled "crappy vs happy" (or maybe it was happy vs crappy, either way...), and I stumbled upon it the other day! It made me smile so much I decided to write one of my own.

Crappy: not having enough room in my purse for my camera...
Happy: looking down and seeing that nearly everything inside of it is yellow, including the purse itself.

Crappy: not being able to visit a museum for years.
Happy: getting into one for free because some of your favorite clients got married at one!

Crappy: how many calories a can of mountain dew has
Happy: when you decide not to care and go for it anyway

Crappy: feeling under appreciated at my office job from time to time.
Happy: but finally getting somewhat of the raise I was promised 9 months ago!

Crappy: keeping birthday secrets from my husband...
Happy: looking forward to telling him his surprises!

Crappy: not having much free time due to so many edits that need done so soon!
Happy: still loving every second, and finding beautiful gems like this that I can frame.

Crappy: having to work Fridays while your husband gets them off.
Happy: having an entire free night with him to kick off his b-day weekend celebrations!

Crappy: not making exercise a priority this week.
Happy: realizing its okay...and learning to forgive myself.

Crappy: that daylight savings time will be over soon, so it will be darker earlier!
Happy: that when its brighter in the mornings it'll be easier to wake up and get my workout done with before my day really starts.

Crappy: not getting to see your friends as often as you like.
Happy: but being able to have a random ladies night with some co workers (and cheesecake, duh!)

Anyway, happy friday friends. Caleb and I are shooting a wedding tomorrow, and Sunday is my misters birthday and I can't wait to celebrate all day long! Love that man. Enjoy your weekend!!

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

When you get emotional...

...just let it happen. That's kind of a new motto I've picked up, Lately, I've been getting choked up over the smallest of things. I've found myself lately stepping back, realizing, wow...I've got an amazing husband, and serve SUCH an amazing God.

Sunday when I was able to put my dress back on for my friends photo shoot...Caleb zipped me up and mentioned how funny it was, its like I was a different bride with my brown hair. Seeing him in a fun little get-up wasn't half bad, either!!

More than just having a blast getting our pictures taken while wearing my wedding dress for an hour or so...I have to talk a little bit about my experience at the photo shoot, and how it inspired me, as a photographer, and as a wife.

There was a shot that Reese (Renee's fiancé) took and he looked at the back of his camera, and said something about how much he could tell Caleb loved me...I hid the not-so-dry eyes I was beginning to get, and went about having a blast letting him twirl me in my dress, being silly with me...etc. Fast forward through an hour of laughter, hilarious calf grabbing (yes, you read that right), and some silly games...and we had nearly reached the end. Renee had one final idea, and she wrapped us up in a blanket in the middle of this gorgeous field as the sun was setting. Then she asked us to close our eyes as we faced each other, and think back to our wedding day, and what our favorite part was. Before she could even finish telling us to think about our wedding day, the tears had already begun.

Our wedding day was so special to me, and at first, I thought the emotion coming back to me in that moment might be a little embarrassing. While I started to apologize for my tears, Renee said "Kayla, don't apologize, it's okay..." so calm, and just let us have a solid minute of silence.  I think it was the fact that I was back in wedding-day mindset, and the fact that I was in the middle of the most gorgeous sunset...but God spoke to me in that moment. I went back to every moment of my wedding, and one of my favorite parts of our day? When Caleb was willing to feel insanely vulnerable in front of EVERYONE who was important to us, and sing to me, playing the cords to one of our favorite songs he'd only learned 3 days before. He told me his favorite moment was when the doors opened and he saw me walking towards him for the last time as only his fiancĂ©. Goodness, I love that man.

I felt so inspired after that photo shoot with them, that I had an engagement shoot scheduled for the next day. Normally, after working all day at the office, my only desire is to go straight home, eat and relax. But this time? I was ready for a full hour of fun with this couple. I started looking at that hour as more than "work", but an experience. It's my job to make these clients happy, have a blast with them, and remind them just HOW in love with each other they truly are. I want them for just a moment, to even forget the camera is in front of them, capturing their every move.

Sure, love isn't always easy...but it shouldn't be too hard either. It should be the kind of thing that comes easy to you. Nothing short of laughing 'til you cry in the kitchen, staying up until 2AM on a Tuesday night just because, and ordering a dang pizza together even when one of you is on a diet.

Happy Wednesday, everybody. Hug your loved ones!!

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

In the midst of our fall list.

Such an amazing weekend. That's all I can say! Friday, I left work early and we got a headstart on our little road trip back to Mount Vernon with enough time to spare, that we even got to play in the leaves and had ourselves a little tripod photo shoot before the rehearsal dinner.

frisbee golf! I actually wasn't half bad.
can you spot the frisbee?

The whole weekend was amazing. Saturday was the wedding, so we went to lunch with the groom (caleb's college roomie!) and I relaxed before the day really began.

The ceremony was quick, and the reception went really was so fun catching up with all of Caleb's friends!!

My sweet man put his jacket around me during the cold walk back to our car at the end of the night. I quite like him ;)

We stayed both nights, and when we woke up Sunday we made the trek back home. I had been looking forward to Sunday FOR A LONG TIME. I got to put my dress back on!!! I know my girl Renee is INSANELY busy and it'll probably be a few months before I even get to see the pictures but we already know how amazing they are going to be! They treated us to the best day ever. Reese (Renee's soon-to-be mister) made ribs for lunch. Freaking ribs. Who does that!??! (He's an amazing host!!) We had a blast stuffing ourselves silly, being photographed, but ultimately realizing they are two of the most amazing people we've probably ever met. I swear, we gabbed on for a while about how awesome they are and we can't wait to hangout again.

I hope you guys had an amazing weekend, and a great Monday!
PS - I know I told Becky like 5 times yesterday, but I HOPE YOU HAD THE BEST BIRTHDAY EVER YESTERDAY, GIRL!!!!! ;)

Friday, October 17, 2014

Looking forward to...

Typically Friday's in blog land are to talk about your past week, a few favorite things from your week, etc...but this Friday I want to mix it up a little bit and talk about a few things I'm looking forward to!

Taking a half day and going on a road trip this weekend!
That's right. We're going BACK to Mount Vernon this weekend to celebrate the marriage of one of Caleb's college roommates, and we're so excited for them! We get to stay on campus where we went to college, so THAT will bring back a few memories!! We're also hoping to bring the tripod and snag a few pics on campus near some pretty Fall colors. We'll see!!

Do you guys remember me talking about my amazing friend Renee? All I can say is thank God for the internet for bringing us together. Girlfriend is one of the sweetest souls ever!! Not only that, but she's an AMAZING photographer, getting married in December, and moving to Hawaii next year. Talk about a whirlwind. She's wanting to redo her portfolio so she's asked Caleb and I to be her models and I am dying for Sunday to get here. I get to wear my dress AND yellow shoes again. Oh, and did I mention I get my hair and make up done for free? I could get used to that. I can't wait to take this beauty out of the bag come Sunday!!

I just settled a date with a few of my favorite ladies in my family to bake cookies all day in December. I know "too soon, Kayla!", but it ever too soon to start preparing for the wonderful season of Christmas?!? Besides, cookies are an all-year-round sort of thing ;) I also can't wait for Halloween, and Thanksgiving...just for the record!!

All these edits I have to finish.
As much time as it takes up in my day-to-day life, I find myself smiling right along as I look back at pictures I've snapped. Memories, captured in time...that I GOT to be a part of. So cool!

My mom coming home.
Guys. I pick her up from the airport on the 27th. I mean!!! That is so soon. Can't wait to squeeze her! I'm really excited to see what God has in store for this season in her life. Looking forward to midnight movies, sweet tea and lots of laughter and healing on the way.

Caleb's 26th birthday.
It's next Sunday! Well, the 26th (yep, its his GOLDEN BIRTHDAY...its a thing, look it up)!! I can't wait to spoil that man rotten. I love birthdays, and I love him mix the two, and you've got one excited gal over here.

What are you guys looking forward to?

Thursday, October 16, 2014

It's no ones fault but my own.

I mentioned yesterday in my random-filled post that I had a silly little meltdown over practically nothing. I think it was just a ton of little things that had piled up in my brain and when Caleb and I started talking about something I didn't want to talk about I just. blew. up. I'm talking, ugly cry, knees-bent, hands-in-face cry right there on the bathroom floor.

If that sounds like I just described a 4 year old, then you'd probably be right...except it was me. Even though I was being extremely ridiculous, Caleb let me cry (because lets be real, sometimes a girl just needs to vent and let it all out for whatever reason). Not only did he let me cry, he held me, gave me the perfect little pep talk (which was exactly what I needed to hear), and completely shifted my perspective on my day-to-day routine. He said "maybe you should change your attitude"... and while my first reaction was to be upset and yell at him for the comment, I thought for a second first, and realized he was right. I needed to shift my perspective. I heard God saying to me... listen Kayla, be thankful for what you have. The busy stuff is a blessing, too, even when you don't feel that way.

The ultimate root of my silly meltdown? I'm almost positive its that I don't give myself enough 'me time' to enjoy things that I love on my own...usually when I get in a night to myself? I'm spending it eating a cheap dinner, and editing photos for 4 hours at a time. Don't get me wrong, I love a quick drive thru meal and editing beautiful photos...but that still includes doing something for someone else, and I need to figure out a better schedule to keep my stress levels lower.

I think as women (or anyone with a family and/or a job that you care about), sometimes we do our best to make sure everything is done for everyone else, making sure your family is happy, your home is clean, and a good dinner was prepared for your husband. While that's all very true to some of us and those are all good things, its good to be a little selfish sometimes and say forget it. The laundry can wait, the editing can wait, and you can order take out for yourself....and sometimes? A bubble bath is in order.

I found myself emailing a few friends about how stressed I've been, will be, etc. I feel like I'm just going through the motions of my day to day life. I keep saying "I can't wait to find time to finish that book", or "maybe tonight I can squeeze in a phone call with my friends?", when I ultimately know none of those things would get done. Then I face the realization that its NO ONE'S FAULT but my OWN for not making time for myself a priority. Sure, I'm extremely busy most of the time...rushing from an office job, to Starbucks to meet with a bride, to back home to edit, workout, and make dinner... but you know what? I think its silly sometimes, rushing around like that. Everyone needs time for themselves. I truly believe that taking time to do things that you love makes you want to be better in every aspect of life.

After my 20 minute bubble bath last night (thanks Er, for the amazing Disney princess version!!), I felt happy. Not that I don't normally feel happy on other evenings, but I think I was proud of myself...for finally MAKING the time.

Oh, and another random thing? I'm sick of the fact that I'm not a morning person...I've always wanted to be that girl who wakes up in PLENTY of time to write a blog post, make hot chocolate, go for a run and maybe even pack her own lunch ALL before her 8am commute. I can't even fathom that kind of morning routine...but I'm determined to get there soon. No one is stopping me, but myself.

So ladies? I dare you to take a bubble bath tonight...finish that book, write in your journal, spend extra time doing something you love, and watch the difference in yourself unfold.

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

So much on my mind!

I'm just gonna type. I have no idea where this post is going to go.

I've got a lot on my mind.
I'm hoping Caleb and I can pay off a crapton of debt this month.
I'm obsessing over our budget, making changes, tweaking it all the time.
I'm praying my mom finds a job when she moves home.
I'm feeling thankful that I've got two jobs, but I'm also feeling stressed because I've got two jobs.
I'm the first to admit I had a weird, tear filled meltdown last night.

I'm thrilled Caleb and I finally have a (safe) car.
I'm so thankful I have quite a few amazing friends I know I can depend on.
I'm praying that these piles of laundry will all be done soon.
Wishing I had a little more time so I could finally finish a book or two.
I can't wait to have our debt paid off and start saving for a house (can we fast forward 2 years?!)!!
Who am I kidding, I can hardly decorate our little apartment as it is. Ha! *forehead slap emoji*

Wishing I was good at doing my own nails. They are neglected.
Excited that Caleb and I got to see my grandparents and brother last night.
...oh, and that they made us chili (and gave us leftovers).
Thankful I have a roof over my head.
Caleb and I have been listening to a lot more country than usual, and we love it.
So happy we're getting back into lifting at the gym. Caleb is amazing to have there with me.

^^^ Cracking up at things like that above! ^^^ cutest ring bearer ever?
Wishing we had our pumpkins to carve already. I'm scared that there won't be any left!!
I had one of the worst dreams ever last night that made me wake up covered in sweat. *scary*
Excited for my first Skype photography consultation tonight!
Really beginning to brainstorm Halloween costume ideas! So excited.

I know guys, most random post ever. I just had a lot on my mind with no real agenda for this post at all...per the usual. So that's what you get :) what random things are running through your head today?!

Monday, October 13, 2014

I survived!

1 family shoot, 2 weddings, and 2 more engagement shoots later...we made it! Phew! It was obviously a couple really long days but Caleb and I danced more than usual, ate a lot of pie, and took silly pictures of each other with our down time.

Something awesome happened on Friday, though. Not only did we get to see a ton of old college friends, we had some really sweet words said to us that nearly brought me to tears. It really made me once again realize, how AWESOME this job is. I get to spend time with some of the coolest people, get to be there for their most intimate moments, and deliver the photos that they will literally hold onto forever.

Can we talk about the two STUNNING brides we got to photograph??

I really have nothing else to say about this long weekend. It was amazing, tiring, and fun. Sunday was spent doing a couple shoots, then sitting on my butt the ENTIRE rest of the day. How'd you spend yours??